Have not been posting … December 2, 2011

that does not mean that i have not been writing….

even with my imperfect writing skill and broken English, writing in this blog has been one of my venting outlets (sometimes, it is the only one i got).   Lately, i have written quite a few that were not posted.  i have been penning down my feelings and yet have not the courage to click on the Publish button.

Also haven been busy with the boys and the Princess.   (That reminds me that i have not been updating her photo blog too!  -.-lll )

Since the school holidays begin, KZ has been skipping school.  Well, he is in the childcare, so there is not such thing as school holidays.  However, since KJ is not schooling, i also pulled KZ out of school to enjoy the holidays.   We went swimming, feasting at Ahjisan Noodle shop, playing Animal Kaiser, going Ikea, baking cup cakes, making cookies, etc

For the past week, Princess has been ill.  Her nose was so blocked that she had not been drinking milk (difficult to suck with a blocked nose).  She lost her chubby cheeks in less than a week.   She has not been sleeping well too.  I have been camping in her room for the past week.   Now, that she is recovering, i just have to play by ear.  If i am lucky, she will sleep thru the night.  If i am not, i will have to camp in her room till morning.   Another to note at, Princess has turned into one red hot chilli padi.   Well, who can blame her?!!!  She has to survive in this jungle with her two elder monkey brothers!

Last monday, i brought my helper to register for her course.   She is starting school in January 2012!!!!  Yippeee!  I am happy for her to have this opportunity.  Hope she is too and will study hard to make full use of this course.   The registrar was kind enough to let us looked thru the name list of the students.  She saw a few fellow Indonesians.  Hope that will put mind at ease that she is not the only Indonesian as the course is quite popular with Filipino domestic helpers.

KJ is going for his Taiji Exchange Competition on this Sunday.  Yes!!!!  his first competition!   It is a pity his father is not going to be there to support him.  Chairman has flew to Shanghai.   He had missed KJ’s start of school year at the beginning of 2011.   He brushed off the “Back to School with Dad” program that the school organised on the 1st day of school.  Then, I was upset but i talked myself out of it by reminding myself that Chairman had to be working very hard to earn a living for the family.   That was the old me.   This time, we had a big fight over his trip to China.  I do not think that anything can be more important than your own son’s first competition!   At last, i lost the fight…  so, this sunday is just me and my camera to support my little hero.   Win or lose, he is already my hero.

KZ had completed level 7 of Jelic Program (for developing “Brain Power Engine”…. anyway, it is just an enrichment to occupy his time).  He is now moved on to MPM, together with KJ.   Proud of his achievement too!  😀

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me slacking? February 17, 2011

i have been a bit slack in my posting.

partly due to my mood swing and secondly due to a new phone.   Mr Chairman got me a iphone and “forced” me to use it.

Yes, me the ungrateful bitch, i said “forced”.

i dun like high ended  techology gadget phones.   i know what’s my qualifications (Chairman always uses this to taunt me).  But now i prefer simplicity.   i need a phone to CALL and TAKE PICTURES.  That’s all.  Full stop.

After using the iphone, i am lost.   i dun know how to compose message, how to save pictures into my pc, how to upload my fav songs to my phone, etc.   i have been feeling handicup for the last few days.   However, i was not born stupid.   i am learning and coping with this new phone.   And Mr Chairman has been most patient with me by helping to setup fb and email in the iphone.    Hopefully i can handle it by end of this week.

i got my new oven.  But i can’t show you yet.  (dun know how to save pictures to my computer)

i want to show you Princess’s first poop in potty.  (already up in facebook)

i want to show you more of Princess’s pictures.  (hmmm…. same reason)

hopefully, next post i got pictures up and going.

Another thing is that, now, with my capable maid cooking all meals, i hardly needed in the kitchen to do experiments.   Thus, Mama’s Kitchen has not been updating for the longest time.  i will do so soon.

My maid, thou, is very good in cooking, she is not daring to experiment new recipes.  She is doing repeative dishes which i had taught her.  By now, she is also running out of ideas and has been asking what we want to eat instead of planning the meals herself.    i am not blaming her.   Having able to plan and prepare our meals for the past 8 or 9 months (since the arrival of Princess), she must have exhausted all her brain juice.   She is a gem that is so hard to find.  i appreciate her hardwork and will miss her when her contract ends at the end of this year….

Guess who sent me an sms… October 26, 2009

this afternoon i received an sms from an unknown number.

it said, “hi mam sherly you are good employer in my eyes… You are better than other employer.”

This message is from my ex-maid… (the one that treated me like a queen).

she is having a hard life now.   Miss that silly girl too.    Well, this is life, once you make the decision, you will have to bear the consequences of that decision.   This applies to me too…. haiz….

i am sourcing for an helper too.   But after the last episode of “Crazy Maid”, i am really very scare to make any decision.   At the same time, i am really not in very fit condition for the daily household chores.

My mood is very down.   At times, i am really depressed.   Well, this is the different between this pregnancy and my previous ones.   With my previous ones, i was working.   i get to meet people, enjoy aircon, enjoy food.    Though, i suffered from nasty nausea symptoms too, but back then, life was easier.    Now, i have to go market, cook, wash up, etc….. you should see my face turning green when i stepped into the wet market or supermarket.     You should enjoy the sound effect when i was doing the cooking too.    My boss looked at the food and asked, “did you vomit into the food while cooking?”

i hardly cook dinner now.   can’t make my way to the kitchen…. i try to find as many opportunities as possible to “coma” on to my sofa….

my duet with maid ends here… i hope August 3, 2009

On saturday night, i slept with the kids.   i told the maid not to sleep in the children room as she told me that one girl at the training centre was having fever.    She had spent a night at the training centre, i do not want to take the risk.   Anyway, she was so unstable that i simply scared that she would go bonkers in the middle of the night and harm my children. 

On sunday morning at 8.30am, i was waken up by a phonecall.   Upon dragging myself out to the hall to pick up the phone, i was faced with the most depressed face in the whole wide world.   She was standing beside the phone waiting for me to pick up.    

i noticed that she has not changed.   She did not even greet me.   i asked if she has bath and taken her breakfast.  She replied “no, later”.   She was supposed to bath right after she wake up.   She then continued to clean the kitchen half-heartily with the saddest face.

i told her that if she is so unhappy working here, i cannot keep her anymore.   i insisted that she eat something now because i wanted to send her back to the agency.   Then she said no and that she wanted to stay.  ???? with this kind of face ???  dream on it, gal!!!!    i said, no and explained that i did not wish to see such lousy face every early morning.   i was paying her to work, not to see this kind of soap opera.       Then she mumbled something about “…. mati how?”

Oh…she was threatening me with death now.    i told her to pack her clothing immediately.   She then reached for a bottle of detergent and asked “Mdm, can i drink this?”

My feet turned jelly.  But i put on a brave front and gave her a stern “NO!!!!”  and snatched back the bottle.

Then she started rubbing and scratching her face with both hands like a crazy woman, saying “i dun know why like that, Mdm…..”

Then she took the bottle again and asked “Mdm, can i drink this?”

i shouted “NNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!   ARE YOU CRAZY! PACK YOUR BAG NOW!”

 

i quickly woke CM up and informed him about the situation.   i escorted the maid to her cabinet to pack her bags.   She was sobbing and still asking to stay.    ???? really crazy hor….

So, in order to calm her down, i told her that since she misses her son so much, then she should go back to Indonesia first to see him.   Then come back again.    (i was keeping my fingers crossed!!!!)

As she was packing her clothing, there was a moth ball in her drawer, she picked it up.    I thought she wanted to put it in her bag.   And yet her hand holding the moth ball was going to her OPEN MOUTH.    With a quick reflection, i slapped the moth ball away from her hand.   I WAS PISSED OFF NOW.   MY ANGER SURPASSED my fear.  

I SHOUTED AT HER ” YOU CRAZY WOMAN!  YOU WAN TO MATI, GO BACK INDONESIA TO MATI!”

“DUN YOU DARE TO DO THIS KIND OF THING HERE……..THIS IS MY HOUSE!!!!!”

“YOU GILA WOMAN, PACK YOUR THINGS NOW AND GET OUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

 

CM called her sister to help to take care of the children, while CM and myself escort her back to the agent.  It was too early that we had to wait at the coffeeshop for the agency to open at 10.30am.   Throughout, she refused to drink or eat anything.   But i also dun want to bother too much about her.   i was relieved to get her out of the house.

 

Finally, the agency was opened.    On hearing the events, the agent advised us to make a police report.    The police report can helps to justify in the event that M.O.M. questioned why i kept on changing maids and also to ensure that this troublesome maid do not get transfer to another family.      CM and myself then dragged ourselves …. with the maid in tow…. to the police station.    Thru out the short journey, i was on my toes.   Scared that she might turned crazy anytime and do anything stupid.    We spent the rest of the morning at the station.   Of course, the police had to take statements from us and also from her.    And the officer also called the agency to get information.   We left at about after 12noon… with her in tow…. again… back to the agency.   Before we left the station, the officer gave her a stern warning in Malay language and escorted us to the car.   

i was MOST relieved when we reached the agency.    The agents were also sympathetic to me and my fucking luck on maids.   My agent offered another maid to me without any charges, but i was too exhausted to even look at the bio-data.  

i simply want to end my duet with maids.   God is telling me…. Shirley, get a hold of yourself and do it yourself!!!!!

i read from a forum, some singaporean mothers can handle 2 or 3 kids without maids.     i wonder why i cannot.    i also realised that with a maid, i tend to be too busy organising my maid that i have become disorganised myself.    i was much more disciplined and organised before i started having maids to help out.     

i was having all these noble thoughts of running the household on my own again …. when CM poured a pail of icy cold water on me…. ” A maid is a necessity.   It is something we must deal with!   I CANNOT AND WILL NOT HELP YOU WITH ANY OF THE HOUSEWORK.”  he said.

 

…… yes, boss….

the crying maid part II August 2, 2009

 

She is still crying…. not sobing… but wailing.

On friday morning, 7.30am, she begged me to change her $2 dollar note to coins.   For her to call back Indonesia.   This was the second time she mentioned changing her dollar to coins.   Because, her friend (whom she dun remember the name) told her that 10cents is enough to call back Indonesia for 1min.   When she mentioned this last week, i told her that she needs a calling card which cost $10 to call back Indonesia for just half an hour (calling to a mobile phone).   i told her dun waste the money.  She is not going to get paid ($10) till end of August.   i told her dun waste her money on phone calls.  i am giving her 10min to call home every month.   That should be enough.

And i did let her called back a week ago.

Now, she asked the same request again.  i was fed up.   Early in the morning before need to rush KJ to school, i hate to be bother by these kind of lousy issue.   And she was already with her crying face.   Begging me “please Mdm, One time, One time….”

i told her NO.   She is here to work not tour.   And she has been giving me trouble since she arrived.

i told her if she dun believe me, i would call the agent later to talk to her.   She immediately said “no, no”

My mood already spoilt.

After i sent KZ to school, i came back home with my marketings in my arms, i rang the bell for her to open the door for me.   And she came running out with a mop in her hand and her face full of tears!!!!!!!!!!  and she came wailing.

at first i tot she was laughing (wailing), then when i realised she was crying, i was shocked and angry!!!!

i asked her angrily “WHAT HAPPENED NOW????”

And she said “dak apa” (never mind)

i nearly screamed “for you, dak apa.    for me, you cannot always cry cry cry”.

i immediately called the agent.   From one corner of the hall, i could hear the agent SHOUTING at her over the phone.     She continued to cry, wail, sob, WAIL again………….

Then she passed the phone to me.  The agent asked whether i could bring her down to the agency.  For they need to talk to her in person.  OMG…  they just did a face to face counselling last sunday.    Now, had to do it again!!!  i really had no choice, i could not handle her emotion myself.

She is also becoming too scary to be in the same house with us.   Last sunday, after the counselling at the agency, we brought her back home for her to finish her work while we wanted to set off to the beach.   In the kitchen, whatever i told her to do, she refused to answer or even looked at me.   After a few minutes, i was so angry that i scolded her to focus on her work and not about her homesick.   That was when she started using her fist to hammer her head and started pulling her hair.   Then she rolled on the floor.    i was just too terrified to let her stay at home or even to be alone with her.   So ended up, we had to bring her along to the beach.   Thru out the outing, she just stared at the sea like a lost spirit.   She looked so pitiful and yet … haiz…  she cannot be doing this at our expense.  

Coming back to the story.   

At the agency, the agents also could not get thru her mind.  So they called the Admin Office.  And a lady by the name Cindy was put on speaker phone to scream at her in Berhasa Indonesia.    If you ever think you scold your maid badly, you should listen to how this lady SCREAMED at her.   my legs also turned jelly.

After 15min of “counselling”, the Admin Office decided that they have to talk to her in person.   And she had to stay at the training centre for one night and can only return on saturday.   i was relieved to let her go.  even for one night.   i badly needed the peace.

The agent sent her back on Saturday evening.   Because the agent just did a drop off, i did not get to speak to the agent.    So when i asked her what did they talk about at the Admin Office, she answered “no Mdm”

“No talk…. because give two choice, go work or come back Indonesia, i bingune”

“Monday go again”

huh????  what????  After spending the whole fucking Saturday, she has to go again on Monday????????!!!!!!!

what is this ????   !!!!!!!!!!! 

and what the hell is “bingune”

she said headache.

So was she having headache at the Admin Office so they cannot get any answer from her???!!!!

After a few rounds of goose chasing the duck, we found out she meant “confuse”

So ultimately, she is confused to whether she wants to work here or go back Indonesia.  If she cannot even GET THAT into focus, i cannot keep her anymore.   She is just too confused to work.

CM decided to let her go tomorrow morning.

the crying maid July 25, 2009

my helper cries.

she cried when i taught her how to mop the floor.

she cried when i told her she must bath 3 times a day.

she cried when i told her to change her clothing after shower (yah… she dun change when the clothing is less than 12-hour old (on her body).

she cried when i scolded the children.

she cried when i told her to wait till all bowls and plates are completely dry before keeping them in the cabinet.

she cried when she talked to her mother-in-law (who is deaf and not close with her).

she cried early in the morning when i said “good morning” to her.

anyway, she has been crying for every single little thing.   First time i was shocked.   i asked her what was wrong because i was neither anger or talking to her loudly.    i just don’t understand why was she in tears.   By the end of the week, she pissed me off with her tears already.

i called the agent and the agent questioned the reason for her tears.   The answer that they get was the same as what i got from her.  “nothing, mdm” “i dun know, mdm” “i cannot tahan crying, mdm” “no, i am not unhappy, mdm”.

The agent questioned her further and managed to confirm (i dun know how true is this confirmation) that she is home sick.   so the agent asked me to let her write back to home.   BUT, i already did the posting of letter for her and i let her call back home.   However, she dun have a home phone in indonesia.    her husband holds a mobile.   And the husband always not at home but left the mobile at home with his deaf mother.   ???? logic?…….. dun know.

So she has been calling a few times and always the deaf mother answered with “huh? huh? huh?”  

Knowing that her mother-in-law is deaf, she still whispered to the phone.   However,  she hung up after a few seconds because the other side could not hear her.   But not before the Boo booo boooo crying.     She only managed to talk to her husband on the 5th try.   of course, she cried all over again.  

haiz…………..  can anyone tell me how long usually this crying session will last?

Personal Hygiene II July 22, 2009

as per advise from my old pal, Mary, i showed my helper how to apply the deodorant.  yah… i raised my arm and rubbed that damned thing on my armpit.  

as per advise from my boss, the almighty Chairman, i teached my helper how to bath (with soap) and must clean her armpits.   showed her again how to fold the toilet paper before clean the backside.   He said that i must drill her everyday, until she get her hygiene up to standard.

Because yesterday, she rolled the toilet paper into a tiny ball and use the tiny ball to clean KZ’s backside.  With her fingers all stained with shit, she passed the stained paper ball from one hand to the other hand.  ????  When i told her to wash her hands immediately.  She did it within two seconds.   WITHOUT SOAP!

Yesterday, what made me jumped was that i found the children’s shirts and pants, which were soaking wet with sweat in the laundry basket with the rest of the clothings.   The stained and wet clothings were there since Monday evening, after they went to play in the playground.     i was looking for KJ’s missing glasses in the laundry basket when i stumbled on to this smelling and wet clothing.    Well, you dun have to use much of your imagination, you should know how high and loud i JUMPED!!!!   But she just don’t understand why the wet clothing cannot be put in the laundry basket.   i think her nose is worse than mine, because she can’t smell the foul odor from the clothing!